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Rants and more rants.

Sitting here by 12:16 am. Thinking of what my life has become. How things are, How tired I have become of the power sector (Maybe just BEDC or the fact that my heart yearns to be somewhere far away). 

And then discipline. How disciplined am I? I'm not happy about that. I think of my life. My friend clocked 30 yesterday. I will in 2 months from now. 

Am I serious at all?

What's it with me?

Spiritually, I don't feel I've been doing great. You don't want to know
Intellectually, I haven't been doing fine either. I hardly read these days. 
Financially, I feel I've been doing badly. Haven't made any cash on my own apart from the BEDC cash since 2015.And I don't like it. I feel I should be doing better.

Aaaaah! Am I going crazy about all these?

I thought of leaving BEDC during the weekend. I just don't feel myself anymore in what I do. 

I somehow have an idea that If I had to work for someone, I had to do a task that would be challenging. A job that I could grow in. something that the employer would have to think twice before letting me go and all. 

I just feel anyone can do what I do. I am privileged to lead the team because I was on the scene first. Nothing more.

The commercial side of the electricity business was not my idea at all. Not to talk of the New Economy Unit where you wonder what your focus really is, You do most of the jobs. You just have an idea that you are to reduce commercial and collection losses but that would mean doing lots of things.

I had no problem with the level of responsibility given at first but its all coming down. I'm not getting the satisfaction anymore, 

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